What Are Your Duties As A Best Man?

As a best man, you might not exactly be responsible for planning the wedding, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t have your responsibilities. Here, we’re going to look at some of the roles the best man can play. It’s an honour, there’s no doubt about that, but it also comes with duties that you have to be ready for. Expectations might differ depending on the groom and the wedding, but these are some of the most common duties.

Be his errand man

It might not sound like the most graceful position in the world, but if the groom is playing an active role in planning the wedding with his future spouse, then it’s going to be up to you to be his assistant. This might include helping him check out vendors, picking up supplies for the wedding if they need to be prepared in advance, or even being his wingman if he’s looking at different options. Basically, you have to play the role of his helper in whatever it is that he has to organise. You will likely not (and really shouldn’t be) doing any of the decision-making, but you can offer a helping hand so that it’s much easier for him to do it.

Helping the groom get suited and booted

You’re not likely to be playing the deciding role in anything that the groom wears during the wedding or after when it comes to wedding bands, but you can certainly play an assisting role. This can include doing a little research to help find places that do wedding suits, as well as men’s wedding rings that he can take a look at, and if he asks for your opinion on anything, be sure to give it. When it comes time to fit the men of the wedding party with their suits and shoes, you might play a role in helping to organize and transport them to where they need to be, as well.

Rally the groomsmen

The groomsmen are going to be performing a similar duty to you but in a much lesser respect. As such, in the lead-up to the big day, you’re going to be something of the informal leader. If you need a little additional help at any point, then you should be able to call on their help. It can be a good idea to arrange for a small get-together, such as a pint at the local to get to know everyone if there are people in the wedding party who aren’t acquainted.

Putting the stag do together

This is the role that you probably thought of, first, when you were asked to be a best man. Indeed, while it might be the part that every group of guys looks forward to the most when the wedding is announced, the stag do is going to require no shortage of organising on your end. This includes ensuring that you invite everyone the groom would want to be there, finding the right destination, picking activities, and scheduling the whole thing. You can enlist the other groomsmen to help with shepherding people together, especially when it comes to getting people to confirm whether or not they are able to make it because there is always a delay when it comes to getting the final numbers. Just make sure that you’re organising a stag that the groom would enjoy and appreciate. There’s sometimes pressure on men to choose the most stereotypically debauched options available but despite what some of the guys might say, there is a role for restraint.

Make sure your buddy is handling it well

Getting married is a momentous occasion for anyone, and such a big life change, not to mention the energy, time, and stress that can go into planning a wedding can be a big deal for anyone. A lot of people assume that it’s brides who get emotional in the lead-up to a wedding, but men are just as susceptible to it, as well. Checking in on him, taking him out for lunch, and giving him a call now and then, especially as the wedding draws near, is a good way just to check that he’s doing okay, and not getting cold feet about the big day.

Delivering your best man’s speech

It’s not just the groom who can get a bit nervous leading up to the big day, it can happen to the best man, too. In particular, a lot of best men get a little shaky about having to give a speech in front of all of the wedding attendees. The best way to eliminate your nerves about it is to write your first draft of your speech early and practise saying it often. Writing a best man’s speech is a challenge that you have to meet yourself, and you have to find the right balance of funny, heartfelt, cheeky, and appropriate, especially based on who is attending the wedding. A lot of us have been to a wedding where the best man ended up embarrassing everyone due to a story that got too blue, too personal, or too mean in its jokes.

Be the main support on his wedding day

On the day itself, your place is going to be at the right hand of the groom for the entire day. You are going to be helping him get ready (so you should make sure that you know how to tie a tie) in the morning, making sure transport and photographers are all ready and waiting to go, and getting him hyped up for the biggest day of his life. Of course, during the ceremony itself, you might be holding onto the ring until he slips it onto the bride’s hand, too.

While the best man might not have the biggest role to play in the average wedding, there’s still plenty for you to do, and you had better be ready to take charge of it. The groom, bride, and wedding party rely on everyone playing their part, so make sure that you play yours.