The ‘Fast & Furious 9’ Trailer Just Dropped, And It’s Laughably Bad

I have been a fan of the Fast & Furious franchise since the beginning, though I’m partial to the first three movies.. You know, before the cars became an afterthought rather than the stars of the show. Sadly, the more ridiculous action sequences they kept adding, the more people that bought tickets. And here we are now.

The trailer for Fast & Furious 9 (aka F9: The Fast Saga) just dropped today, and if you thought it couldn’t get any worse, just you wait. In the nearly 4-minute trailer, we see cars and trucks defying physics, people coming back from the dead, an evil brother that was never mentioned in the past 8 movies (so much for “family”), a magnet plane… and a rocket-powered Fiero.

Here’s the synopsis for F9:
Dom Toretto is leading a quiet life off the grid with Letty and his son, little Brian, but they know that danger always lurks just over their peaceful horizon. This time, that threat will force Dom to confront the sins of his past if he’s going to save those he loves most. His crew joins together to stop a world-shattering plot led by the most skilled assassin and high-performance driver they’ve ever encountered: a man who also happens to be Dom’s forsaken brother, Jakob.

Watch the trailer above and see for yourself just how ridiculous it looks. Yes, this franchise has been a dumpster fire for awhile now, but with Fast 9 it’s officially jumped the shark. But people are idiots, so it’ll probably still gross $1 Billion and spawn a dozen more movies. 🙁

F9 races into theaters on May 22, 2020.