7 Things Every Man Should Have in His Camping Pack

Heading into the great outdoors, eh? Here’s a few things you are most certainly going to want to have in your pack.

1. The Almighty Multi-Tool

First up, the multi-tool. This isn’t just any tool; it’s the Swiss Army knife’s bigger, badder cousin. With everything from pliers to a bottle opener, it’s essentially the Batman utility belt of camping. You might not think you need a miniature saw until you’re faced with opening a stubborn bag of beef jerky or need to fashion a shiv from a twig to fend off a particularly aggressive squirrel.

2. Light It Up: The Trusty Flashlight

Next, we have the flashlight. Not just any flashlight, though—a tactical one that can signal SOS to Mars if need be. It’s for those moments when you need to find your way back to camp after answering nature’s call in the middle of the night. Plus, it doubles as a handy zombie deterrent and a makeshift lightsaber for duels against imaginary foes or real ones, depending on how the trip’s going.

3. Fire Starter: Because Rubbing Sticks is for Amateurs

Unless you’ve got the patience of a saint and the skills of Bear Grylls, bring a fire starter. This can be anything from waterproof matches to a flint striker. The ability to start a fire not only ups your survival chances but also significantly improves your Instagram camping aesthetic. Just remember, we’re aiming for “cozy campfire,” not “call the fire department.”

4. The Life-Giving Water Filter

Water is life, which is why a portable water filter is a must-have. Sure, the water looks clean, but so does glass, and you wouldn’t drink that. Avoid playing gastrointestinal Russian roulette with stream water by filtering it first. Your insides will thank you.

5. Shelter: Because Building a Leaf Hut is Harder Than it Looks

Some form of shelter is crucial, and no, the car doesn’t count. A lightweight tent or a hammock with a mosquito net can be the difference between a night spent stargazing and one spent swatting at bugs and cursing the ground’s unevenness.

6. Pepper Spray: For Bears, Creeps, and Everything in Between

Ah, pepper spray—equally effective against a bear or that weird dude who thinks “remote campsite” is synonymous with “join uninvited.” It’s the perfect “I wish I didn’t need this, but just in case” item. Just be sure to aim that pepper ball gun away from your face. Learning that lesson the hard way is… memorable.

7. A Good Book: Because Nature’s Great, But So is Stephen King

Finally, bring a good book. There will be moments when the fire’s crackling, the crickets are chirping, and you’ve had enough of nature’s majesty. That’s when you reach for your book and remember the joy of getting lost in a story that doesn’t involve you trying to start a fire with wet wood.

So there you have it, the absolute, no-questions-asked essentials for any man’s camping pack. With these items, you’ll be prepared for almost anything the wild throws at you, Have fun!